A Prologue to an Emerging Story

The moon stood in an almost perfect circle on the firmament. For her, this meant time for ritual. The priestess sighed; sometimes she wished there were different ways. Sometimes she wished she could refuse to see.
It was a warm summers’ night despite the light rain that hung over the coast for days. She loved this weather, the rain was not strong enough to permeate the clothes, tiny droplets a fragile silver armor on top of her woolen gown. Mist  arose steaming from the meadows, hovering above the small creek in front of her house. This is the time when the fairies are dancing, her thoughts drifted to the heavy scent of wet soil, dead leaves and moss that filled the air. How she loved the smell of the woods and earth, entwined with the salt of the sea. She took deep breaths and enjoyed the peace, while the wolves howled in the distance. They are howling to the moon, they are praying like me; she thought and sighed. There was change in the air, soon far too soon—but not yet.

Her hut stood in some distance from the settlement. It was close to the sacred place she took take care of. The mountain-silhouettes framed the idyllic place she called her home. She was contemplating how much she had enjoyed the years here. What would she be doing? Would the change force her to leave? Should she go back to the green isle? The wolves where still howling, soon, far too soon—but not yet.

She forced the dark thoughts away and tried to focus on the task at hand. Filling her lungs with deep breaths she tried to empty her mind. She had washed face, feet and hands before taking the gifts to the goddess. Fresh milk, oatcakes and some flowers would do during an ordinary summer’s night. When she reached the place close to the waterfall she put the things down on a little altar and poured some of the milk into the water. After she bound her skirts up with a knot Rhiannon stepped into the stream. The cold mud squeezed through her toes, invigorating water around her ankles washed the tiredness away. She pressed her feet deep into the mud. With raised arms the young woman looked like a statue, carved into the landscape for eternity, the moonlight on her skin leaving her seemingly translucent—a quiet breeze lifted her hair.

The wolves where howling again in an eternal night in an ancient time singing old songs of life, singing old songs of love, singing old songs of war, and of hunt.
But they were also singing the song of change, as the earth had told her, as the water had told her—a necessary change the fire had said. And she sang to the moon, and to the wolves the ancient song of life.

Soon far too soon, but not yet.

-sisters in arms 01-

Remembering an Easter Monday

Blonde hair and blue eyes. A pudgy little arm suddenly hugged my right leg. The other hand placed on a rusty chain, dividing the landing-stage into two. The creaking metal is supposed to prevent tourists from falling in.
I was looking across the lake to watch the boat approaching when I felt the hug, followed by a little head leaning against my thigh. Eyes equally in awe and fear looking across the water. The little boy, leaning against me, is completely oblivious that the leg doesn’t belong to any of the accompanying adults. He just puts his whole trust, and all of his trust, in the leg holding him, being save, not falling into the water. I ruffle the blonde tuft, the hug gets tighter.
Giggles and apologies are offered in French, when I turn around grinning.
Meanwhile, we still have a 75 cm long, tiny moment of perfect trust.

Frost Giants

Frost giants were looming in the dark shadows of the valley.
Waiting for her to walk into their trap again.
Your soul is ours.
They chanted disguised as demon wolves—yellow eyes gleaming in the night.
Your soul is ours.
They chanted disguised as birds with broken wings.
Your soul is ours.
They chanted disguised as lovers with blue eyes.
Your soul is ours.
They chanted disguised as abandoned puppies.
Your soul is ours.
They chanted disguised as husbands.
Your soul is ours.
They chanted disguised as books of adventure.
Your soul is ours.
Frozen air hummed in the midst of summer.

But then the lion roared.
His heavy mane shaking in anger.
When the lion roared
Light broke through the ice.
Her wings unfolded to full size.
Warmth on white down.

When the lion will have roared the curse will have been broken.
Until then hold on to Michael’s sword, sever the ropes of ice.
Blue cloak protecting against the cold.

Leaving the Lair

Tired eyes observed the air carrying hues of winter, shrouded in greys and whites, as the morning mists lifted; shooed away by an impatient tired sun. Her fur bristled—yet again. Bad hair days are really bad for a wolf. The ebb and flow of the dance had left her tired. Old unknown wounds pinched and pained, and then healed. Just sleep. Just more sleep was all she needed. But before she could even finish her yawn, a new song forced her attention. There were no drum beats, no tip-tap patterns. A song like steel. A song like ice and fire. A song that hummed so deeply it tore at the last big wound. Ripped it open. The tear—an earthquake—set free a howl so ancient, so abyssal it lacerated through space and time.

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And then her body shifted. Convulsions shook her whole being, while tears of liberation ran. Washing away the pain. Washing away the grief. Washing away the self-loathing. Pelage carried away by autumn-wind left skin smooth and pale like alabaster. Gone the claws. Teeth no longer sectorial. Sharp eyes, still amber, took in their surroundings, like never seen before.

For ultimate protection: Stand tall within yourself.

Upright she was bigger, stronger than any she-wolf possibly could be. So much stronger. In such a short time. Just because the song tore the wound—this new, old, familiar song. Naked she stood in golden autumn light. Reds, yellows, browns, shaded her view of the blue sky. Goosebumps now without the pelt. She turned around. Her claymore rusty after centuries in the cave. Strong hands on cold steel. Time to battle. Time to heal. I am the light. I am the truth. No place for frost-giants. These souls shall be mine. Warriors of light.

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Born out of darkness: Memories

She swallowed the darkness with every breath; it was so thick. There was no escape. Just darkness all around, all within. The only colour: tiny droplets of crimson, turning into gold, once they hit the ground.
‘My soul is still bleeding then.’ A thought. As she stared at her feet, immersed in a puddle of gold. The pain screamed into her ears. There was no escape. No running. Nowhere to go, but deeper into her self. Deeper, and deeper, through the darkness, she went. The pain jumped out at her, screeching again, but she pushed it aside. Deeper, and deeper, until she saw a thread of light, the first thing she actually saw since the crimson and gold.
Light.
She bent down to pick up the thread. Her hand touched the vibrating cord. There was sound. A quiet sound. Some sort of hum. She pulled. The sound became louder. Amidst the humming there were words. So she kept pulling. There seemed to be more thread, somewhere, deep in the darkness. She held tight, kept pulling, and began to make a ball of yarn—a ball of light.

The sun shone, on this chilly May morning, she could already feel the warmth on her face. Toes ice-cold and barefoot in morning-dewed grass as she walked among the rows of apple trees. Gentle blossoms in white and pink. Leaves beginning to emerge. Blackbirds singing. She was content, in the middle of spring.

The ball of light became bigger as she moved along, the humming louder, the words clearer.

A little girl in a blue and white nightgown stood underneath an apple tree, reaching for fragile blossoms—carefully. Cold dew dripped, and left traces of winter-echoes running along her arm. Everything was so clear. The air. The morning. The blackbirds. Life. This was before. Before the darkness came.

She sobbed. ‘How many ways to say goodbye?’ A second thought. It was easier to breathe now with the ball of light in her hand.

The dragon moved his claws lazily through the sand, just the claws not the paws. The other dragon turned her head to look at him.
‘What are you doing?’
‘I am stretching.’ He chuckled.
The little girl was curled up in the crook of his arm. She giggled.
‘Can I hide a bit longer here? I am scared of the darkness.’
‘Of course child.’ She-dragon said.

‘I remember.’ Thought number three.
‘I remember!’ She almost shouted
‘Eventually the girl was grown older, and.’ She paused.
‘And the dragons, pushed her, gently, a paw steadying her lower back; but they pushed her away; to go out into the world; to face the darkness; to stand on her own two feet.’ She continued the story, quietly talking to herself. The ball of light had grown. She was barely able to hold it in two hands now.

A blue ball-gown swished as she twirled. She didn’t want to go to the ball. Loss had torn a black hole into her heart, into her soul. Darkness had already begun to ooze, taking over, pushing the light away, and making her ill.

‘And then I walked through the garden for hours and sang. I sang. The words just came; the melody just came. And everyone was listening, the grass listened, the beetles, the birds, and the hare in the field behind the garden fence. Everyone stood still and listened, as I called them in my songs!’

‘That’s it!’ She shouted, almost dropping the ball of light, clutched tight to her chest. Light was dripping from the twine, running through her fingers. Escaping.
‘I bore witness to life!’ She shouted on top of her lungs.
‘No!’ She stopped herself.
‘I do bear witness to life. I do bear witness to love! I am light.’
And the ball of yarn exploded into a thousand rainbows, into a thousand songs, into a thousand stories, into a thousand poems. And the little girl in the blue and white nightgown danced out of the darkness into the light. Blue ball-gown swishing. Gold glistening as it sprayed in all directions with each dancing step. And then she sang. She sang again to the grass, to the trees, to the beetles, and to the hare and the fox, in the field behind the garden fence.

Fire Dance

He shook his wet fur.

The drums slowly began to irritate him.

Again, and again a deep hollow sound, trying to force him into dance. But all the bear wanted was sleep. Why would the drums not leave him be?

Because this part of your journey just began.

Suddenly he saw her. Silver-grey fur shimmered in the light of the fire. Amber eyes fixed on him, as if she wanted to take in every single hair of his fur. He shook his massive head. His soul felt strangely exposed. He sneezed.

Around the fire, full of energy, so fast, so smooth, and suddenly she was close, too close. He growled, his massive body tense, but she was already gone again.

‘No! stay!’

He wanted her to stay. He wanted to nuzzle her fur, feel her warmth.

But the dance! The dance was too much.

There she was again.

And gone.

Silver and grey flashes passed his vision.

Slowly, very slowly he began to move. The rhythm carrying him after all.

He just needed to dance.

The drums took over.

The journey began.