Maybe Depression

Maybe depression
If you sleep twelve hours
And still are tired
And can’t wait for the evening to arrive
Although you just got up
Yet another day to get through

Yet another day

That’s not you
You are happy go lucky
You are relaxed
Undemanding
Thrifty
Funny
Warm
Smart and
Smartass
Caring
Cheeky
Passionate
Grateful
Always
Learning
Moving
Reinventing
Embracing life
Joy
The little moments

Yet another day is looming
You can’t bear to face
Another day
Where institutional abuse
Is perpetuated
By government bodies
By family court
Another day
The voice of a father is silenced

The louder that silence becomes
The louder is your pain

And I am scared
So scared
That maybe
That one day
Is a day
You won’t be able to face

Empty Space

IMG_20160926_113506Fathers’ Day—25 Years On

The hubbub of empty rooms
The hullabaloo of music gone bye
That unbearable rage of silence

Your shadow walking across the courtyard
An ethereal body chopping wood
The echo of your smell when I hugged you
The intangible sensation of your love

I am grown up now
The resonance of conversations
Reverberate in an empty space of my heart

25 years on
The empty space is quieter now
The echoes shallower
The excruciating sound of silence
Muted by life going on